"Not much of a Kubrick fan, are you?"

Not being connected to my e-mail has shown just how dependent on this technology I am...and I'm not that happy about it. But, I do believe it's best to keep it all in perspective...and a sense of humor helps. And that is exactly where the computer generated response is lacking - in humor. Case in point....here for your viewing pleasure is the copied manuscript from my "live-chat" with "Dave" from Time Warner Cable who is my e-mail provider. Enjoy.

From: chattranscripts@twcable.com
Subject: Time Warner Cable Chat Transcript
Date: September 12, 2010 7:24:43 PM EDT (CA)
To: lestile@nycap.rr.com

Thank you for contacting Time Warner Cable Chat
We hope that your session with Technical Support was helpful
Below you will find the chat transcript that you requested. We recommend you keep this for future reference. Our Customer Service is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week! - if you need to contact us again, please visit http://www.timewarnercable.com for any questions relating to your Time Warner Cable service, or for Road Runner specific assistance please visit http://help.rr.com.

Dave: Hello! Thank you for choosing Road Runner Internet Technical Chat Support. My name is Dave. How may I assist you?
Linda_: Hi guys, just need to know how to get my e-mail back on line
Dave: I will certainly provide you with all the necessary information. To get us started, I would need to verify some security information and then we can move on to understanding your setup. Feel free to ask questions along the way.
Linda_: Dave - could you open the pod bay door, I mean tell me how to get my email to accept it's password?
Dave: Before we begin, please provide the following three pieces of information to verify your account and to document this interaction for future reference: 1. The account holder's 10 digit telephone number. (xxx-xxx-xxxx) 2. The account holder's Full Name (First and Last) 3. Please tell us your name.
Linda_: OK - my phone # is 518-884-2814

Linda_: my name is Linda Ellett
Dave: Thank you for the information.

Dave: Linda,I understand that you are unable to access your RoadRuner email., am I correct?
Linda_: That's right, Dave, it tells me that my password is invalid
Dave: I regret the inconvenience. We are currently experiencing an issue with our email service wherein our email servers are down. Due to this sending and receiving of emails will be affected.
Linda_: Dave, please open the pod bay door
Linda_: I mean, when can I expect my email to back on?
Dave: I regret currently no expected time of repair is given. We are working on it and some of the servers have been restored back. I request you to try accessing your email account after 5 to 6 hours. I deeply regret the continuing inconvenience caused in this regard since yesterday.
Linda_: But Dave, I really need to check my e-mails. They won't get sucked out into space if the pod bay door opens by accident, will they?
Dave: Please be assured that no e-mails will be lost. Your e-mails are presently being queued and will be delivered to you once normalcy is restored.
Linda_: Dave, normalcy would mean that the oxygen level stays consistent. You'll make sure that it does, right?
Dave: Yes.
Linda_: hmmmmmm - you don't read lips do you?
Dave: No Linda.
Linda_: Ok Dave, but I might have to shut you down, and you'll be singing Daisy dasiy soon.....
Dave: Bye.
Dave: You can always visit http://help.rr.com for online FAQs to get more help and knowledge about the products and services offered by Road Runner.
Dave: Thank you for contacting Road Runner technical support, again my name is Dave, we value you as a customer.
Linda_: Not a Kubrick fan, I take it.....
Dave: Thank you for understanding the situation,Linda.
Linda_: Listen, I would understand if I was trying to reference an obscure French film, but come on, this is Stanley Kubrick's 2001...who wouldn't like to banter about that?
Dave: Analyst has closed chat and left the room
Linda_: Dave....Dave.....Dave!!!!!

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Not a fully gratifying conversation.....but at least I amused myself.